


Muted

by ESpirit210



Category: Stardew Valley (Video Game)
Genre: I don't know what to put here, I have too much time on my hands, Oh yeah the farmer is mute and nonbinary cause I'm a sucker for those, Other, im so sorry for this trash, mentions of suicide and cutting, wait actually though what do people put here
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-03-01
Updated: 2020-03-01
Packaged: 2021-02-28 03:13:55
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 3
Words: 2,335
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/22976719
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ESpirit210/pseuds/ESpirit210
Summary: Marnie forces Shane to learn sign language, due to the new mute farmer that moved in.PS I can't sign language im sorry
Relationships: Shane/Farmer - Relationship
Kudos: 20





	1. Prologue + 2 ♡

**Author's Note:**

> Look I have no idea what I'm doing...  
> Also the farmer is mute cause i adore writing mute characters  
> And I don't like writing genders cause it feels weird
> 
> PS the dialogue is pulled straight from the game

“Oh come on, Shane. You shouldn’t be rude to Ray. They’re a sweet person.” 

Shane buried his head in his hands and groaned. Even before Marnie’s extensive sign language lessons, he never wanted to meet the farmer in the first place. Her lessons only solidified Shane’s hatred for anything even related to them. After all, it wasn’t his problem if they were mute.

Marnie shot a disapproving glare at him before adding on some seasoning onto the food. She scraped the food onto the plate, set it on the table, and called out, “Jas, dinner’s ready!”

Jas bowled into the dining room. She settled into her chair and proceeded to stuff her face with cauliflower (provided by a certain mute farmer).

Shane smiled fondly and stood up. He stretched, then said, “Welp, I’m headed towards the saloon if you need me.”

\-----

The farmer, as always, entered the saloon at 10 pm. Shane watched as they made their way towards Clint for the first time since he told them to leave them alone. 

Clint stared questioningly as Ray pulled out an amethyst and put it on the table. He then sighed and said, “I don’t buy things from other people.” He handed them the gem.

Ray shook their head, then pushed the gem towards Clint again. He repeated himself, then handed the amethyst to them again.

They sighed, and dug around in their bag that they always carried around. Shane knew, from past visits to the saloon, that they were looking for their notebook. Today must not have been a good day for them, seeing as how they came up empty handed.

In a last ditch attempt, Ray bent both their index fingers, smiled, and mimicked handing a gift towards Clint. He obviously didn’t understand what they were doing, as he stared and continued to drink his beer.

Shane recognized it as sign language for “gift,” since Marnie had forced him to learn when everyone found out that the new farmer was mute. He was either more drunk than he originally thought, or tired of watching their exchange, but he set down his beer and said, in a fairly loud voice, “They’re giving it to you. It’s a gift.” Suddenly aware of everyone (except Pam, who was even more drunk than he was) staring at him, he felt his face flush and continued to sip his beer. 

Since his back was turned, Shane couldn’t see the beaming smile that Ray had on their face as Clint accepted the gift while thanking them.

\-----

Helping out Ray that day was one of the worst mistakes he’s made so far, Shane soon decided. Not only were they giving him gifts every three or four days, they were constantly acting like they were friends. 

Ray had quickly figured out that Marnie taught him sign language (he still suspected that she specifically told them that). Whenever they saw him, they would sign short sentences or a couple of words together to form short, semi-coherent phrases to describe how their day went.

\-----

That day, he sat on the docks contemplating. It would be so easy to… just end his life, and no one would know and no one would have to know.

His thoughts were interrupted by the creaking of wood. He glanced up and saw Ray taking a seat right next to him, and signed  _ fishing bad _ . They sighed and took off their boots and socks, then dipped their feet into the cold water. Their posture was closed off and they looked down at the water before they looked back at Shane. 

“That’s why you’re up late, huh?” Ray nodded.

Shane took another sip from his beer, then pulled a spare beer from his jacket and handed it to them. He shook the can a little and said, “Here, have a cold one.”

Ray stared at him, eyes wide and eyebrows slightly furrowed in a slightly concerned expression before taking the beer.

“Buh… Life” Shane said. Why was starting a conversation so hard, even when he had alcohol in his system?  _ Welp _ , he thought, _ I better say goodbye to any chance of being left alone _ . He continued, “You ever feel like… no matter what you do, you’re gonna fail? Like you’re in some miserable abyss and you can’t even see the light of day?”

Now Ray was looking at him with a clearly concerned expression, before shifting their eyes back at the water and nodding. So they did know the feeling. He never would have expected that, judging by how annoyingly cheerful they could be.

“I just feel like no matter how hard I try… I’m not strong enough to climb out of that hole.”

Ray tensed up and began to pick the dead skin on their lips (usually a nervous habit of theirs). They picked up their drink and finished it in one go, as if they tried to think of something to say, but couldn’t.

“Heh... A fast drinker eh? A person after my own heart. Just don’t make it a habit… you got a future ahead of you still,” Shane told them. He pushed himself off the dock and it took longer than he would have liked to be able to stand like a normal person again. “Welp, my liver’s begging me to stop. Better call it a night.”

As he was about to turn around and leave, he felt a slight tug on his jacket. Ray had gotten up, and after making sure they had his attention, they slowly rolled up their sleeves to reveal an array of scars covering their wrists and wrapping around the inside of their arm.

Shane could only stare. They were fairly old, and there were far too many of them to be an accident.

Ray smiled sadly, and signed  _ You can make it. I did _ . Then they hugged him, tentatively wrapping their arms around his chest and squeezing slightly. After they let go, Shane sighed and said, “See you around Ray,” before turning around and leaving them behind.

\-----

Shane would be lying if he said that he wasn’t avoiding Ray. He always left to work before the farmer got up, which meant that he barely got enough sleep to keep him functioning (seriously, why did they get up at the crack of dawn?). During the day, he used his job as an excuse to not talk to them. At night, he resorted to drinking in his own room and feeling miserable in general.

It only took the farmer a few days to figure out his new schedule, and would take to signing a couple of words to him on the way back and visiting Marnie’s house at night. They never entered his room, but he would always hear a knock and a moment's pause before the pair of feet walked away from his door. 


	2. 4 ♡

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Ughhhhh school  
> Also i suck at writing im so sorry ;-;

Shane was woken up a week after the incident by cold water hitting his face. He jolted upright and saw the farmer standing over him, clipping their watering can back around their toolbelt.

Marnie was standing behind Ray, hands on her hips with the (now normal) expression of disappointment on her face. “Shane! What’s the matter with you?” she asked, her voice getting louder by the word. “All you do anymore is mope around in your room and drink beer!”

Shane groaned. His headache was killing him, and having someone yell at him definitely wasn’t helping. “You wouldn’t understand,” he muttered to himself.

Ray looked at Marnie and Shane, frantically waving their arms to try to calm both of them down, but to no avail.

Marnie sighed, and said softly, “I’m worried, Shane. What’s your plan? Don’t you ever think about the future?”

Shane scoffed. “Plan?” He looked out his window. Judging by how the light was pouring into the room, it was sometime around noon. Shit. He was late for his job again. At this rate he would be fired. “Hopefully I won’t be around long enough to need a plan,” he said bitterly.

He heard a soft gasp from near the door and turned around just in time to see tears form in Jas’s eyes before she ran off. Marnie ran after Jas, leaving Ray and Shane together.

Shane looked down at his feet. Of course, he just had to mess everything up, didn’t he. Of course, because that day decided that they wanted to screw him over, his hangover decided to give him a splitting headache right then and there.

Ray quickly knelt down next to him and took out their notebook to write _Do you need painkillers?_

“I’m fine!” he snapped. He really wasn’t, but there was no way that he would tell them that.

\-----

The next day, he returned to his normal schedule. There was no point in trying to avoid Ray again, since they already knew about how big of a mess he was.

Ray, for the most part, left him alone when he was drinking in the saloon, but always left slightly before Shane to meet up outside and tell him how their day went. They seemed to understand his need for personal space. He kind of wished they would talk to him a bit more though. 


	3. 6♡

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Like legit I have no idea what I'm writing  
> Also I can't write depressed characters if I'm not depressed
> 
> PS I'm sorry if the scene feels flat and like nothing happens  
> Cause I can feel that

Shane ignored Marnie’s protests and wandered outside. Why was he outside? There was a cliff outside. Right. He could end his life right there and no one would care or notice. He teetered on the edge of a cliff for a few seconds and wondered what it would feel like for all his bones to crack and break. Fear overtook his heart and he fell backwards and rolled onto his stomach. Why couldn’t he do it?

He heard footsteps approach. Whoever had come shook him gently, before kneeling right beside him. Shane looked up to see Ray standing above them. Of course. They were usually there when he messed up. “Ray...” he whispered.

“I’m sorry,” he mumbled, then let out a small hiccup. “M… My life… It’s a pathetic joke.”

Ray took his hand and traced  _ NO _ on his palm. 

Shane ignored them and rambled on. “Look at me...Why do I even try?” he asked more to himself than Ray. He curled up slightly. Something hurt, but he couldn’t tell what. “I’m too small and stupid to… to take control of my life...”

They squeezed his hand. Shane couldn’t care less.

“I’m just a p... piece of soiled garbage flittering in the wind...” he continued. At this point, he wasn’t sure if it was the rain or his tears running down the side of his face. “I’ve been coming here often lately… looking down...” Why was he even telling Ray this? They weren’t going to care. They didn’t have any business with him.

Honestly, at that point, it was probably the alcohol talking more than himself. “Here’s a chance to finally take control of my life… These cliffs...” Shane muttered. Part of him hoped that Ray didn’t hear that, but judging on how their grip on his hand tightened, he could throw that wish into the ocean.

“B… bu… but I’m too scared, too anxious,” Shane cried. “Just like always...” He retched a bit. Oh Yoba he felt awful right now. Crying after drinking a lot did not mix well at all.

They scooted closer towards him and adjusted his body so his head rested on their lap. They took off their raincoat and laid it on top of him.

He was still cold, but now that there was something that blocked the rain, he found the motivation to continue spilling all his problems. Shane said, “Ray… All I do is work, drink, and sleep ...t… to dull the feelings of self hatred.” He rolled over, off of their lap and closer to the edge.

He shifted himself so that he could Ray clearly and said with his voice shaking, “Why should I even go on? Tell me…” 

They didn’t respond. All they did was look down at the ground in front of them with their hands over their mouth. Shane could just make out the tears that spilled onto Ray’s face through the rain.

“T… Tell me why I shouldn’t roll of this cliff right now…” He needed this. He needed someone who went through the same thing as him.

They brought their hands down and shakily signed  _ Your choice _ .  _ I will be here either way _ .

Shane stared for a moment. They weren’t going to stop him? Still, a sense of relief washed over him. At least they weren’t forcing him to do anything. “Thanks...” he muttered. After a moment, he said, “Ray… I think you should take me to the hospital now,” before he blacked out.

\-----

Harvey had talked to him about going to see a therapist the second he was awake. Shane agreed to go see one, since it was probably the best choice. He didn’t want to have to deal with the thoughts in his head telling him that he was worthless every second of the day. 

After being able to leave, he avoided the saloon for the rest of the day. However, this didn’t deter multiple people from going up and telling him how much he meant to them (He was certain that people didn’t actually do it because they liked him). 

Shane knew one of the downsides of living in a small community meant that news traveled fast, but that didn’t mean he couldn’t be annoyed by it. When he got to Marnie’s house, he spotted Jas sobbing her heart out, who, according to Marnie, refused to go inside until Shane had arrived. She caught sight of Shane and immediately hug-tackled him. She refused to let him go until he promised her that he would never attempt something like that again.

Marnie let out a sigh of relief as Shane entered the house with Jas still attached to his hip. She cooked his favorite dish that night, and attempted to keep the conversation somewhat light, before suggesting that they go visit the farmer the next day. 


End file.
